Styling

(I still have a headache ... Not completely un-typical. Whine!)


Styling: I know it seems that a post like this should've come first. But I felt it important to explain the history and characteristics of my hair--and certainly the relationship that I have with my hair!--before I try to expound upon the ways I treat it. So hair (ha!) it goes.

I'll break this down into categories: Foundational, Product, Styling, Tips.


Foundational: The Must-Dos for your 'Do. (laaame line, but...it'll do.)

1. Trim, Cut, Treat! Each cut or trim is like a spa treatment for your hair and scalp. We're talking exfoliation, moisturization (is that a word?), rejuvenation. The cut is the most foundational aspect to healthy, happy hair. (Curls, or not!) The best advice I can give--whether you're willing to shell out the dough or not--is to keep a regular appointment. Damaged hair: you're looking at a trim every 6 weeks. Healthier hair: between 8 and 10. I cannot say enough  how important it is to maintain regular maintenance. Since I have for my own, from June 2010 to now, the back of my hair near the crown, has transformed. From hay to silk. (Wait...did I just make a "Rapunzel" ref???). But seriously, it has. And my ends, they do not split! My hair feels strong and smooth before, during, and each shampoo and condition. (Okay ... unless I got a bit heavy with the hairspray. But still.) Even by the 2nd or 3rd appointment, my hair improved in weight, volume, and texture. GET REGULAR CUTS. Also ... it doesn't hurt to splurge. You really need someone who understands how to shape and cut curls. ...Yes, you do. Finally - be not afraid to approach the reliable or ritzy (or both) salon in your area. First, guaranteed they give free consultations. Second, you might be surprised by how affordable wash, cut, and style is. (I was! Pleasantly, so.) But since you're the number one person hanging-out with your hair ... here's what you can do.

2. Shampoo: As previously noted, do NOT shampoo every day. Every 2-3 days, depending on product-use and sweatiness..., is best.

3. Condition: It pays to invest. Buy the more expensive (I mean as in the $20 and plus) conditioner. I'd say shampoo too...but I haven't made that investment, yet, either. Again, I use Bb Super Rich. Not necessarily for every condition: prob. 90%. Seriously, it is fabulous. Luxurious.

3. On-and-Off: On off-days (that is, non-shampoo days) rotate between rinsing with conditioner and rinsing not at all. (Shower-cap-it!) For example: on extremely humid days after a shampoo or a condition, when my hair has reliable texture, I would not rinse whatsoever. The added water-moisture on the cuticle of the hair, as opposed to the product-moisture that locks moisture into hair, will cause crazy-frizz.

4. Loose the Towel. Dry using a T-shirt. That's right. A plain, cotton T. (I use a white one.) T-shirt absorbs excess moisture from your locks to make for more efficient diffusing and other such styling, while the smooth surface abstains form creating excess frizz and fluff. My fellow-curly-haired-friend, Cassie, let me in on this secret. (She's a BK girl [Brooklyn], and apparently the City has these sweeeeet salons just for [gasp!] curly-haired people.) Uh-mazing.

6. Leave-it-In: Always. Always coat your strands in something. Leave-in. Regular condition (which I frequently use). Olive oil. Mayonnaise. Egg. I don't care. Something. Something that will cuddle and protect your hair. Which leads us to...


Product & Styling: What's good.

1. Good Things Come in 3's: Basically, all curly hair needs 3 styling products: a leave-in, a mousse or gel, and an anti-humidity spray.

2. First Things First: Leave-in is the first product to hit your tresses directly following a shower. I mean even before I T-shirt dry, I run a leave-in through my hair. Mostly, this is a brand of conditioner you might find at the drugstore, such as Pantene. Once or twice in the past, I've asked my stylist if using straight-conditioner as a leave-in causes build-up. Nope. Guess it doesn't. (Believe me: she knows her stuff.) My point: if you had to scrimp on anything, scrimp hair. Buy a decent drug store conditioner, and a dollop will do ya! (Depending on length, hair texture, and volume). I typically use a quarter-sized amount.

3. Scrunchy, Lovey Hair: If there's one thing I've learned about styling, it is NOT that mousse is better than gel, or vice-versa. Honestly, it's what your hair takes-to, depending on the day. For the looooooongest time (like decades), I used mousse. First it was Pantene for Curls. Then, Herbal Essences for curls. Both were fab. But now, for whatever reason, I'm into gel. ...Okay, this is another area where I scrimp. I know! Aren't you shocked!? If I were anyone else reading this blog, I'd assume that leave-in and styling is where I'd spend the most. But really ... it's foundational (cut, condition) and finish (anti-humidity ... which we'll get to!). So--okay, I'll admit it--I use L.A. Looks. (The green colored one.) And I love it! First, it works. Second, it smells delic. Third, it has a C rating in "The Better World Shopping Guide" (Jones, p. 98). (Okay, now I need to cite this sucker at the end! ...If I forget, let me know...).

Quick side-note, "C" is a waaaaay average rating, and there are better (or more expensive) brands I could invest in. ...But keep in mind how much money I'm currently making with this master's degree that, technically, the bank owns. (I mean, right.)

So yeah, I use L.A. Looks. For now, it works. But here's what makes it work ... SCRUNCHING! Maybe someday I'll really learn how to use (gasp!) technology, and I'll create a tutorial. For now ... old fashion wording will do. Briefly - I coat my hair with gel, so that if I were to touch it with my palm, I wouldn't necessarily feel hair-strand. I'd feel gel-coated-hair-strand. This takes maybe 2 or 3 quarter sized dollops, finger combed throughout, to coat my short tresses. From there, I use about 3 more dollops, spread throughout palm and fingertips, to scrunch. Straight-up scrunch. This is an example of what I mean by "cuddling and loving" curls. Instead of continually smoothing-down hair, from crown-to-base, in an effort to smooth the follicle, use your fingertips, like gentle scrubbers, to lift root from crown and to add bounce and shape to curls. Whereas the former leads to frayed and frizzy, hay-like strands, the latter engages and cultivates the natural curl. Trust me. Also! Don't be afraid to throw-in a hair-flip or two, or three. Often, I rock my hair over the front of my face, so I can scrunch the curly-cues at the nape of my neck, or even from ear-to-ear so that the sides get some lovin', too.

4. Enemy #1... You guessed it! Humidity. Humidity is a curly-haired-human's Kryptonite. (Honestly, I don't know "Superman" that well ... so hopefully I got the allusion right!) Especially during the balmy summer or rainowy (remember: rain + snow) winter months, humidity can wreak havoc on otherwise perfectly treated tresses. This is where I really, truly, totally recommend investing. Curly hair needs a quality anti-humidity spry. In fact, when mine ran out this fall, I tried cheating by using a hairspray brand available at drug stores. ... Can's still 3/4 full, and lonely in my closet. (Sorry- just wasn't good enough.)

At this point, I won't pretend to know enough about the  indredients that make a spray such. But I can tell you that "Impermeable" by Oribe is gold. (Actually they make gold pomade for hair, which I've seen featured in fashion mags and have even dappled-in myself. But I digress...) You know what: nevermind. This stuff isn't gold. It's the golden-colored genie that comes out of his golden-lantern who grants you all of your golden-worthy-curly-haired-wishes. Seriously! That picture, on my first post--the one with short curls where I have it completely down! ... as it remained such the entire night!-- that occurred on a hot, hazy, humid August evening because of Impermeable-genie. Invest. You won't regret it.

Tips: The Essentials.

1. Quality cut and stylist: invest. Now.


2. Maintain regular trim/cut appointments. Between every 6-10 weeks. If you can trust your stylist, he or she will let you know.


3. Invest in a quality conditioner. This is the product that will touch your curls most often and probably, first. I recommend Bumble & Bumble (Bb) Super Rich. Delic.

4. Use a T shirt to dry your hair after rinsing! Really: it can't get more simple than that.

5. Always coat hair in something before putting-it-up or (duh) styling it. Product helps to protect hair not only from heat, such as the kind encountered by blow-dryers, but also from other elements, such as ... humidity, or lack-thereof


6. SCRUNCH your curls, after they are well coated with the styling product of your choice.

7. After you have styled, but before you have diffused, try using pin-curls. (Those long, silver metal things I mentioned in an earlier post.) Typically, I clip back the sides and "bangs" of my hair. This allows for faster drying ... and it keeps slimy, gel-hair out of my face.

8. If you are on your 3rd of 4th day without shampooing, focus on up-dos. First, your natural curl probably doesn't have as much shine as it did previously. Second, your hair will have the perfect texture to maintain a sweet, sassy, or simple sweep-up.



9. Invest in a quality anti-humidity spry. Oribe Impermeable. Love.


10. LOVE YOUR CURLS. Embrace them. For real.

The End.

Works Cited.

Jones, Ellis. (2010). The better world shopping guide. Canada: New Society Publishers.

The Big M

Migraine. ...Ugh.

I don't recommend those for anything, let alone curls.


...Until next time, fellow curl-ers.

Break-Time

Alright guys: nothing too new today. ...Except that I might post twice, since I missed yesterday. (Which turned into a surprisingly busy, though fun day, ending in champagne, moody playlists, and sparkly shoes with SaraC! She's kind of like my fashion-guru...okay, and my friend.)

Today's blog is a follow-up from Monday's. Speaking of: Monday night, with still a breaking furnace and temperatures--though warming--still sub-freezing, I decided to shower with a cap and hair band. That's right! I didn't wash, let alone rinse, my hair. Kept it dry and frankly, more manageable.

To be honest, I yet haven't discovered the science behind when it makes best sense to or not to rinse. (Wash- I'm pretty good on. ...Again, will discuss in near-future posts!) Really, I only based this one on time, laziness, and warmth. However, my decis. to not rinse on Monday turned out to make even more sense on Tuesday! At 7:25 yesterday morning, I stepped outside to warm my car and in doing so, stepped into the finest mist of frost and rain that, like blunt needles, pelted my face and my hair and everywhere. Therefore, based also upon yesterday's humidity, I really did make the perfect choice! Here it is:

Yesterday, my hair was on it's 2nd day of un-washed (meaning I shampooed and conditioned Sunday evening). And my hair was on it's 1st day of un-rinsed (meaning I didn't condition Monday). In instances like this, when hair is technically a few days "old," I think it always best for an up-do. Who wants stale, dry, tired strands representing what fresh, glossy, awake curls should say? Clearly, I wasn't leaving my hair down. But because of what I experimented with on Monday's post, I wanted to take today's one step further. Instead of styling an up-do--re-wetting, re-producting, re-diffusing my hair--I wanted to just do one. ...With relative closeness and ease compared to how it looked when I awoke.

Here (<--) is what I looked like, after dress and make-up (makes all the diff!), but with my hair exactly how it looked when I (begrudgingly) woke-up. Notice the frizz framing my face, but the general shape structuring the volume around my crown. Digression: for round, or even square, shaped faces such as mine (round), volume on top helps to elongate jaw-line and an asymmetrical shape, to accentuate bone-structure. (Actually, I've always wondered if there are specifically shaped styles that go, specifically with curly hair, as opposed to face-shape. Some investigating and researching I will have to do before I report back!)

As you can see: I had a lot of good factors compelling me toward minimal styling. The first was that my strands had a workable balance between both dry and flexible. In my experiences, dry is good when the strand has enough texture to style without it immediately frizzing or even breaking. Likewise, dry is not good when curls turn from ribbon-like to cotton-ball, bordering on thistle. In that texture-scenario, I most certainly would have used water and leave-in, perhaps even styling product.

After minimally-restyling my cooperating hair, this (-->) is how I looked. You'll notice that I maintained the original shape by pulling the sides back more tightly to emphasize the volume and asymmetrical shape on my crown. Here are the simple steps I followed for this low-maintenance styling.



1. Took down my hair from its original pull-back. (Again, so technical.)

2. Did NOT use water or leave-in or product. Again, my hair was the appropriate texture to work with as-is. (Think dry and more relaxed--straighter than its usual curl--like an older ribbon on a day-old gift.)

3. Pulled back the sides and back of my hair to separate it from the shorter front-layer (could be called "bangs," for lack of a better term). Let this bang-layer just chill, for the moment.

 4. Fastened hair into a regular pony-tail holder by creating a messy bun. (This turned-out a lot more polished than I ever suspected! Pays to check-out the back of your dome, every now and again.) First, I secured pony-holder around hair once, at the nape of neck (just like how you'd start any pony-tail). With the second tie-around, I twisted it once--before securing the hair--so that instead of tucking my pony under, I tucked it up. Hence the bun-like formation you see near the top. (Ah, hopefully that makes sense!) Sometimes, I do this upside-down-messy because, overall, it lends more lift to the actual pony. Instead of tugging-at the rest of my hair, it adds balance and maintains shape (and volume) more naturally.

5. To secure the "bangs" (which at this point, looked a-80's-mess!), I gathered and twisted them back once or twice, and secured with 2 bobby-pins in a criss-cross pattern. Because my hair already had texture (which happens with--I think--all hair types if they haven't been rinsed in a few), I needed do nothing else to obtain lift and volume. Voila!

Simple: Especially for a rainowy-day. (That's rainy & snowy.)

6. To tame those frizzy fly-aways that you notice in the "before" pic, I pulled back and secured with more bobbies (love those guys) as necessary.







Could this styling have looked better? Yes!!! For one, I could have used an inch or so curling iron, with some Chi!, to smooth back the volume, lending a more even and finished look. I probably could have also secured some of that messy-bun with bobbies, to create a more defined bun. If I'd been headed to an interview or a business-like event: sure. For a regular, ole' workday: this works.

Let me know your thoughts!

Give the Curls a Break

Today, I woke up ... and I looked like this. (-->) Yeah.

Pretty much how I look every morning. (...Maybe now, that question from earlier--something about, What will I do when I live with a boy???--maybe now that makes more sense. ...A lot more.) Well yay for us, there are 2 bright-sides:




1. I still look this crummy with straight hair. (Seeee! It's not just a curly-haired thing.)
2. It gets better.

It does. Today's blog will focus, not so much on the hair, but on how everything else makes-or-breaks the hair. Before the onslaught of my early-morning photo-op begins (...my very immature version of journalistic risk-taking!), I need to backtrack.

From an early age, I quickly decided that hair "makes-or-breaks" the face. While emerging from the tub each evening or upon surfacing from the 4-foot plastic pool my parents erected each summer, I always noticed that I looked different. Better. Back then, I'd say prettier. Last night, upon first glance into the mirror after stepping out of the shower, I can put to words what, at 8, I'd observed.

Alright, I'm no artist, or hair stylist, or expert on shapes and contour, but from my past experiences, it seems that glossy, loose, longer waves--subtle curls that extend past the shoulder--give my face a softer, more polished look. A longer neck, a slimmer silhouette, more defined cheeks, softer eyes. ...A prettier look. Hm, and while this post won't attempt to deconstruct society's definition of pretty, I will briefly qualify by adding: A prettier look according to what society touts as prettier. (Think about it.)

Regardless, numerous hairstyles--not just the pseudo-straight aqua-inspired envy from 2nd grade and, let's be honest, last night--have proven to me that, in a way, hair does make-or-break the face. How many top 10 lists have you heard or read where celebrities or critics or stylists or prom-guides insist that the #1 "must" to the "perfect" outfit is ... hair! ? More significantly, how many times have you, yourself, changed a look by styling your mane? Personally, I've noticed that my hair, slicked straight back with a tiny bun (we're talking un-styled, un-teased, un-primped) is straight scary. Haggish. Oh good Lord, there are many more more to catalog... But that's a different post all together.

Well: You know what readers? Lately, I've wondered if my past 20 or so years of media-glean, and if my past 20 or so years of experience are ... misguided.

You know the morning of my first blog, when I used an expletive while tugging my hair at the roots? Well that morning, I finally stopped toiling with my 'do, temporarily admitted defeat, and moved-on to make-up. Huh, I said, mascara placed into bag, I don't look so bad. Broken angles and nonsense, plaits of natural crimp and coil: my hair jutted everywhere. But dang, I looked okay. So this morning, when I woke-up to a breaking furnace, a -6° exterior temp., a 13.5 hour work day where I'll be pulling down about $100 (okay, that's more embarrassing than these pictures), and that (see below) hair, I knew I had to take drastic measure.

May I direct you to Photo-Op 1:

(I can't believe this picture is making more than 1 appearance ... in the same post.)

Picture 1. This is what I look like most first-things. Hello sunshine! We're talking no make-up. (See those circles???...Concealer's my fav new tool.) Ugh honestly, the only cosmetic happening in this ensemb. is the tan work-out band holding-back my top-floof, and holding-up the bottom.

Well, I got curious. ...Or desperate. Instead of tackling the bed-head-beast first, I put on some clothes.





Picture 2. Here I am in actual attire. Still no make-up. Still no styling. Still, improvement. Interesting...







Picture 3. If this were an experiment, the 2nd variable--number one being attire --would be make-up. I took this picture to see how much my look changed after applying my face. Honestly, if I were super-late (like last Thursday when my alarm was the main-office waking me for work as the school day began: sorry school!), I'd've gone to work like this. It's not fabulous. Or gorgeous. ...Kinda' cute. It's better. Light-years better. In a serious pinch, it's good to know that attire and make-up will do.









Picture 4. These are my curls after I release them from their top-knot, spritz 'em with a bit of water, and blow-em-out with the diffuser for body and separation. (Haha, who knew you could "lift-and-separate" more than just your ... ).





Picture 5. Here's me. Professional me. Post-styling. Hm: not my fav. But then again, I was going to work with middle schoolers and then with coffee drinkers at my side-stint as a barista. (Sounds so much better than saying "my part-time part time" job.) Really, who was I trying to impress?




So there you go. Maybe hair doesn't totally make the face. Sometimes an outfit does. Sometimes, some serious concealer.


Lesson: Don't rely solely on the curl. Sometimes they need a little support, in a little bit different way. Sometimes they need a break.


(P.S. Turns out I didn't have to work! Showed-up and they didn't need me. ...Or rather, I read the schedule wrong and was actually on-call. Yet considering that it's on the way home from where I sub, that I wanted my paycheck anyway, that I needed next week's hours regardless, and that I could now attend an important meeting that last month, I missed ... this was a welcome surprise. No matter how ya' slice-it.)

Night.

Evolution of Free Curls: Freedom

(<--My hair is super curly!) I'm not sure that I ever had one hair-epiphany. If I did, it gradually let itself known. (Do epiphany's do that?) What I can say is that if "it" did occur, it occurred in 3 main stages...or evolutions. Let's examine. The Era Of... 1. Edward Scissor-Head (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099487/)

During the winter-break between 2009 and 2010, I was neither student nor teacher. Student, because it was winter-break... Teacher, because I was a per diem sub at my old high school and therefore, had no lessons to plan or projects to grade! Add friends-who-have-real-jobs (meaning they haven't had a "winter-break" in at least 2 years...) plus boyfriend-who-DNE (for all you math people!), and you get one very bored BarbaraEllen. Very. Bored.

Inspired by the silhouette of a strapless, sweetheart-neck, empire-waist, bubble-hem hot pink NYE mini, and encouraged by the copious amounts of time I had, I fantasized. The perfect shape and texture. The lift and bounce. The flutter and flow. I fantasized about my hair. Colonial-man (-->) wouldn't do.

During this 2 or so week span, I relentlessly goggled and researched curly-hair websites. I found that a number suggested long, metal curl-pins (totally botched that name) in order to help style. Either by placing them at root, to lend lift, or at the end, to give weight, various sites recommend that I style my hair using these. After raiding the local drug-store, I did.

For about 3 months. Every morning with hair wet, sometimes every night--I even tried sleeping with these Medusa-asps!--I sectioned my head into clips. For the remaining stragglers, I used thick bobby-pin-things. (So technical.) I noticed that my hair dried faster, and certainly the curl seemed to have greater definition. Instead of pieces clumping together, curls more freely separated into their own defined ringlet. In addition, I used a .5" curling iron for the pieces that feel flat or frizzed-away, as the websites discussed.

My hair looked cuter. I got various compliments from friends, male and female, alike. Problem was: my ends severed from the weight of clips and pins, and the damage incurred by my already neglected tresses meant even drier hair. And to be honest...the E.S.Head look scared me. (Sorry, no pictures of this!) Ironic. For someone who wanted "free" hair, I gave mine chains.

2. CHI

According to The Free Dictionary by Farlex, chi is, "The vital force believed in Taoism and other Chinese thought to be inherent in all things. [...] a balance of its negative and positive forms in the body are held to be essential to good health in traditional Chinese medicine," (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/chi). I've always likened chi to a life-force that guides, nourishes, and sustains. (Really, I should learn more about it.) I think it's both a huge coincidence and also, no coincidence at all that Cationic Hydration Interlink, or CHI, products have brought both style as well as "balance" and "good health" to my hair (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/chi).

To chronologically backtrack, it was Halloween 2009, the year I taught (tried to teach) myself the "Single Ladies Dance" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4m1EFMoRFvY)--to the left is the public debut while celebrating my 24th!--and also the year I fell in-love with the first season of FOX's, "Glee" (http://www.fox.com/glee/). Naturally, this meant I had to be Beyonc-Glee for Halloween! (Would post pics, but I'm not sure the costume ever made sense to begin with...).

Naturally, this also meant that I had to straighten my hair. A feat which hadn't been tried since Study Abroad Ireland circa 2006... The advent of Smoker-Mom-Hair. ...Yeah. Yet between the advancements of a ceramic straightening irons (thank you Mama!) and CHI Shine Infusion spray (http://www.target.com/CHI-Shine-Infusion-Thermal-Polishing/dp/B000VTRJPE), something miraculously and drastically changed my hair.

...God had answered my prayers.

Seriously. He'd given me uber-straight, silky locks previously unknown to my ironically pasty complexion. He'd given me straight hair!!!

Throughout the beginning of 2010, I oscillated between torturing my tresses with curl-clips and pins and smoothing these same curls with an external life-force that I had craved since childhood. (Who are we kidding? ...Toddler-hood.) However unrefined, the advent of these new techniques brought with them the keys to unlock the chains that encaged, and the doors that would liberate. (You laugh. But a woman's hair is a big deal. Even The Bible says. So...)

3. Gods and Goddesses of Hair

There's this salon I go to. In Rochester, NY. Where I live. It's fabulous. If you live here, or around here, you already know what I'm talking about. It is amazing. World class. Every time I've gone to its Pittsford location, be it for a mani, or an eye-wax, or a styling, or all 3, I have walked-out feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. That's saying a lot for a girl who's still unemployed despite a 2010 Master's, when she should've graduated with her Master's in 2008 from an Ivy League(!), when she had to move from the Upper West Side back home to West Irondequoit...with her parent's, and.... okay okay, before you begin to think I'm bitter, I'll stop. (Giggles!) To make my point: this salon is beyond fabulous.

And so is my stylist. She's younger than me and has pin-straight hair, yet still knows curls better than I ever will. She takes her time with each consultation, thinking thoughtfully before each response, and she uses the products available for purchase, not because she's pushing you to purchase them, but instead, because they truly are the best. Oh, and did I mention that once my hair started growing back more healthfully, SHE recommended that we push our appointments back from every 6 weeks to every 10!? In this economy! That's class.

In June 2010, I finally made an appointment with these gods and goddesses of hair, of pampering. I almost cried. She held the square-shaped mirror in front of my face, at the end of our over-an-hour-long consultation, cut, and style. I almost cried. Redemption. I had redemption from all of those tears and years and screams and struggles. I had my hair, and I had something I could love.

There are a few key things I know that my stylist does (and probably a-bazillion more she knows). Here's the gist of what I got:

1. Chop the dead-out. Yeah, it was short. (I actually prefer my hair short.) But to get it healthy, she cut the dead.

2. Loose layers. And she does this cool twisty-cut thing that helps to shape the curl as it dries. I have to say: it works.

3. Hydration Hydration Hydration. For some years, I'd begun shampooing my hair only 2-3x/s week, even with exercise. Now, I also use a Bumble & Bumble Super Rich conditioner almost every time I condition (and even sometimes as a leave-in!) (http://www.bumbleandbumble.com). It feels like silk and is just as strong. (Which silk is, really, super strong.)

4. Caressing. My stylist caresses my curls. As she adds product, when she diffuses. Lightly, gingerly, lovingly, she molds and twirls each curl into shape. I'm forever learning how to be this-kind-of-gentle. Because gentle looks damn good.

5. Diffusing. HOW HAD I NEVER USED A DIFFUSER BEFORE!?!?!? I've ALWAYS had one. Since high school! Always. Yet I have to admit, I haven't begun to regularly use one until...like, October 2010! That means I went FOUR months, throughout the entire summer, barely using a diffuser. WHAT!? was I thinking???? (Breathe.)

Okay. A diffuser. Is amazing. A) Who wants wet, slimy strands brushing, like the snakey-suds of towels at the car wash, against their neck? B) It works. It lovingly separates each curl so that when I am done, I look like a run-way model for the .2 seconds before I see my 5'2", unmake-up-ed frame. Seriously, it allows me the freedom to style my hair with body. Mostly, it allows me to style my hair not at all. It allows me to just be.

That is what I got.

In closing, one final note (for now) on freedom:

Curly hair always has to be styled. In some form. Whether its a cream or an oil or a conditioner, something needs to moisturize those kinks and lock-in-the-yum. But if already, you're hair is happy and healthy, and if already, you've treated it with love...most of the time your curls can "just-be" with nothing more than a dime-sized amount. Most of the time, they can be free.

...Or free to style however you want. Now, I actually think of hairstyles to match my outfits! I've done '40's, which require some straightening and re-curling (fun!), and side-swept messy buns. Either way, I'm glad to know that I finally know have options. (See-ya Pony-tail and Colonial-man...) You see, it's not just about being free. Rather, it's about freedom from and freedom of styling. It's about the type of free that you choose.

...Until next time!

Evolution of Free Curls: Cumbersom

...Okay, still no pictures. Especially in this post, which chronicles the evolution of my hair and its styles, they'd be helpful. I promise that soon, I will dig through the archives and--shudder--face my scanner. (It's slower than, how do you say, hair that refuses to grow after a botched cut! Seriously.)

Oh what torture I put my hair through. But really, I had no guidance. Think about it. How many fashion magazines have you or do you read where, sure they claim to talk about curly hair, but actually- it's some imposter whose fabulous stylist uses hot-rollers to feign an all-too-perfect curl-like look? (...Similar to that hot-chick/nerd-in-disguise-stunt the movies pull: thank you "She's All That" and "Easy A"...both of which I love! http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0160862/, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0160862/.) Truthfully, I've grown-up with air-brushed, steam-rollered fakes, modeling for me what could never work on finely textured, tightly curled, voluminous hair. Not the products they use nor the techniques they teach could tame these tresses. So, I did the best I could given what I had...

IDENTITY CRISIS:

I can honestly say that the earliest memories of my hair pre-date the nocturnal-praying/begging-sessions of yesteryear. In 1990 and 1991 when I was in Kindergarten (maybe a year before my exorcism-of-the-curls), I vividly recall a clammy, green leather chair that, ironically, juxtaposed the Emerald green walls surrounding it. Though within its natural environment, this beast sat a part from it. Gigantic, cold, grown-up: this chair wanted to eat me. It wanted to eat my hair. Helpless I sat as tufts of dried-up snarl floated from neck to shoulders, stopped to hover around arms, and pitifully, found its resting spot upon the wooden beams that supported us. (They were green too.) But I'm not a boy, I thought quizzically, staring into the square-shaped mirror the stylist held in front of me. I'm not a boy. In his infinite wisdom, my father asked to have my curs lopped-off. Not at the shoulder... But at the neck. The neck! ...Twice!! He did this twice! The second time I remember thinking, resignedly: Again??? Even then I could sense the ironic humor. ...How my mom let this happen, with hair curlier than mine!, I'll never know... (Well, she was in college, full-time, to become a chemical engineer, so... Some things fell by the wayside. Manely--haha--my hair.)

STRAIGHT-PHASE & PARFAITS:

If God didn't lend a hand, I'd eventually take things into my own. Throughout the rest of grade school, I grew my hair long--rarely cutting it--and mostly, I tried the brushing-it-straight-while-it-was-still-wet "technique." ...This went over well. I styled my hair into a giant parfait-gone-wrong: tight curls like raisin nuts bolstered the bottom, looser curls like messy swirls of fruit suspended in yogurt comprised the middle, and teased-out "straight" pieces--shredded wheat, if you will--lingered on top. All of the elements for all of the wrong flavors. ...Scrumptious. By the time I got to 6th grade, my mom and I tried an at-home relaxing cream. All burning around neck and ears aside, this almost worked! For the greater part of 1997, my hair relaxed into manageable waves so that I could actually leave it down ...at least in winter. Yet as my roots grew back and as summer approached, my hair ushered in a new-era. A new reign.

MONOTONY:

For the entirety of my adolescence, including junior high, high school, and an eighth of college, for the larger part of the next decade, for every single day from 1997 to 2004, I wore my hair the same way. (Okay...save for prom and ball...and school picture day. Regardless.) Freshly shampooed and conditioned daily (not healthy!), slicked-back (river-rat), tied-up in the back-center of my head ('80's/stuck-in-a-missed-childhood-of-hair-styling), and endlessly scrunched (obsessive) until tight curls fell past my neck and stopped at my shoulders: for 7 years, I wore my hair one way. The pony way. It wasn't until the second semester of my freshman year at college when I realized that I wanted to look like a college student. Not the-girl-who-got-to-visit-her-big-sis-student. Finally, I began wearing my hair down. One problem: I tortured it.

TORTURE:

Still, I shampooed my hair daily. Or almost daily. (Not healthy for curly, or even dry, hair .) To style, I drowned it mountain-upon-mountain of mousse-globule, and really I willed it to be straight by tugging at every single curl rather than gently cradling them into place. Worse: I never cut it! If anything, my mom trimmed it every year or so. HORRIBLE. Shamefully enough, this never truly changed until this past summer... (I mean, I began getting more regular cuts by a professional. But it wasn't until June '10 that I began regular cuts with a curly-hair specialist. So embarrassing...). On the whole, for the next 6 years of my life from 2004 until 2010, I suffered from hair that I never fully wore down, that broke very easily, that housed its own Sahara right in the back of my head, and whose silhouette formed the stereotypical-triangle so that even when I wore it half-up, half-down, I always pulled it back. ...This led to what I call "colonial man" syndrome. How did I ever date?

FREEDOM:

That was probably the worse part about my hair. I never felt like I could just leave it. Always, it had to be styled, and even then, it had to be hyper-styled so that, somehow, it maintained shape. You know how some girls can just get out of the shower and leave their hair? It doesn't always look fabulous as it dries, but it can be left? I couldn't do that. Or some girls can style their hair, but keep it down. Nothing in it. Free of pins and clips and ties and plastic and metal? Free. Not mine. Mine was always encaged. Tangled. A prisoner of its own tangles. I hated that. I hated feeling trapped. What will I do when I'm too busy for this? How will I handle it when I live with someone else ...a guy? Why can't it just be easier, more natural? These questions seem frivolous, like nothing to get worked-up about. But when they occur every day and when they denote every day for every successive day, they are daunting. Cumbersome. I had me some cumbersome curls. Next post, I'll explain how I broke-free. ...

Thanks for reading!

Day 1

From Day 1, I've haaaated. No, abhooorred. My curls. Sure I look happy here... It was early August in humid Rochester, NY and my hair--short hair--looked good--okay, hot--down. (We'll get to that...) But every summer since, not so much. In fact, I had to be just 5 when I used to go to bed with hair wet, neck strained. Please, God, give me straight hair. So I can feel normal. So I can be pretty. I stretched and tugged and cried. Every morning... I woke up with curls. Scratch that: frizz. Dry, scratchy, frizz. (Pictures to follow... I hope!)

It hasn't been until very recently...some 20 years later, that I've begun to make peace with, accept, and even admire my curls. I attribute most of this to a fabulous cut, keen consultation, and nurturing products. Still, I battle with my hair. Just this morning, in my 25th minute of hydrating and scrunching, twisting and tugging when 25 minutes I had not, I let the bold mass fall into billows around my sweat-soaked face. I then tugged at it like a gardener extirpating root from earth. I [expletive] hate you, I said aloud. Only difference between this morning and those nights 20 years earlier: I didn't mean me. I meant the hair. I meant temporarily, the hair.

This is why I want to write. I want to understand my hair. I want to understand what hurls me toward battle with it. The humidity? The product? The styling? Society? I want to understand what makes the curls look insatiable one day, inscrutable the next. I want to understand what curly--very curly--hairstyles work best with which fashion styles. I want to understand what coiffures look best with which shape face, which eye-wear. I want to understand which products work when it's humid, and why, and which work when it's dry...and why. I want to understand what I should and shouldn't invest in. I want to understand so that others can too. I want to understand, because I deserve to find out.

...This should be interesting. (Please- personal testimonies welcome!!!)